Turning Tourists to the Dark Side Since 1998!!!

please do not shut your site down "while (you) get ready for Black Friday". I shop online so I don't have to deal with Black Friday-related bs. I guess I'll buy nerdy yet humorous tshirts for my friends from threadless.com instead.

Sincerely,
J.

i checked my yahoo email today (which is my main email) and i had an email from coley. looking at her gmail address, it occurred to me that i actually have a gmail address that that uses my full, real name, that i probably havent used in....um...its been a long time. how long?

i tried to log in and my security question was something about DAVID. :) fortunately, i have a long memory and was able to log in with no problem.


i have no idea what im going to do with this gmail account. i use my yahoo email for everything. the only things i DONT use it for are business purposes, which are few, and i have another yahoo account that uses my real name for that. i use it once or twice a year for things related to dental hygiene. i suppose i could use gmail for that. *shrug*

ill come up with something.

it was total insanity. i loved every second of it. i was still so wired last night i didnt sleep at all in spite of joe being totally comatose next to me, but it's catching up with me now.


fire bad. tree pretty.

and I totally don't get the hate. Or the people who said they had trouble following it. Or distinguishing one transformer from the next. Or hated the twins.


I liked the twins, the plot WAS really convoluted, but it did come together in the end, I wasn't confused at all except when the elder decepticon was fighting the new decepticons (at first I was like, "why the fuck is The Fallen fighting the guys he has working for him?") because I totally forgot about him, there wasn't too much action, or too many transformers (is there such a thing?).

but...i Iiked it a lot. im sure someone reading this (you know who you are) will say, "you just dont understand about cybertron and the primes and youre not really a fan and thats why you liked it".

i dont fucking care. it was entertaining. optimus prime still makes me cry. and i love The Beef.

my tiny yarn Cthulhu is done and adorable.

I'm hooked on amigurumi. Next? A crochet, cranky Master Shake.

often, when i am going through events that have left me rocked to the core, i tell myself that good things that i cannot conceive of are ahead, if i can just hold myself together.

this is one of those up times. (off to buy safety eyes for tiny yarn cthulhu my nerdy, adorable boyfriend has asked me to make. if it comes out really good, ill have to make one for mr.and mrs. bitter goth, or as i usually think of them, john and coley).

or, fuck netflix.


like many netflix users, i utilize it to watch season boxed sets of tv shows. right now im making my way through beverly hills, 90210. although i literally have nothing but 90210 in the first seven or 8 places in my queue, today, netflix sent me "clerks" and "the corpse bride".

i realize that my first problem is that im watching beverly hills, 90210. point taken. its my guilty pleasure. when a child is screaming in my face, snot is running down my chin behind my mask, my shoulders are killing me, and my hands are cramping up, what keeps me sane? the knowledge that when i go home, i can lose myself in shallow, fictitious peoples overblown problems. that that red envelope will be waiting for me with the next 6 eps of 90210 in it (bless aaron spellings heart- for some reason 90210 had longer seasons than the average drama- more donna, more kelly and steve, more backstabbing, incestuous fucking, I8A4RE, and crazy schemes).

why didnt they send the next video in my queue? because the next disc- disc 2 of season 7- had a short wait. so what? send me disc 3. and THEN send disc 2 when its available. or dont send them at all. dont send me two movies waaaaaaay down on my queue as a consolation prize. now i have to wait for them to get here, then mail them back (ive seen both these movies, not to mention everyone i know besides me owns them, so i dont care to watch them right now), before my videos MIGHT get here.

also? when i called to ask why they were sending #12 on my queue instead of NUMBER ONE, the rep i talked to seemed surprised that anyone would be dumb enough to ask such a question (or maybe so dumb they wouldnt magically know the answer). he explained the answer to me like i was either crazy or retarded (and no, you cant hear my blonde on the phone. unless i want you to) . when i asked, "well, why wouldnt you just send the next one down, and then send the first one, so the person still has both the dvds at home, ready to watch?" he said, "well, its in order, so we just send the next non-season disc."

"it goes up to ELEVEN!"  *headdesk*

now i have nothing sleazy to watch until my boyfriend comes this weekend to give me a proper rogering and we watch trueblood together.

when people use that word to describe me, im surprised (but at least its flattering; i hate when people describe me as sweet. only someone who didnt know me very well would use that word. i have the capacity to be that way, but im usually more like a sour patch kid- sour AND sweet). but for some reason lately the creative juices have been flowing, ive been making and designing things like crazy.

*right now ive been making tons of cubeecraft toys. theyre addictive. i bought a special pair of pointed tip scissors and a little plate to lean my x-acto knife on and im going wild.

*im going to be close to finished with my aqua teen hunger force charm bracelet by the end of today, i think. if i get up the nerve to shrink them today theyll be easy to complete. the shrinking is the most harrowing part because im never 100% sure how theyll come out. the painting and varnish is easy, and ive already finished making the chain and toggle bracelet part.

*ive been close to finishing my pillow shams for my bed so i may do that today. the pattern for the backing of the sham is an easy repeating pattern so since ive got some good netflix dvds, i just bought a used copy of "from hell"(I love FYE), and the weather outsides sorta crappy, crocheting something monotonous sounds okay with me. and again...i really dont feel good. so crocheting and sipping tea sounds like a good plan.

*ive also decided to get another tattoo, and im designing one myself, making ink line drawings/tracings based on victorian photographs. im not much of an artist but the results so far have been coming out better than id hoped. i had previously thought i would be able to do a rough sketch of what i wanted and press one of my much more artistically inclined friends into service drawing it up for me. now it looks like ill be able to handle that myself. itll be exciting wearing something ive drawn on my own from my own ideas. im still not sure about placement, but at least ill get the design down.

*i also am working on making a pair of fingerless fencepost net gloves. i had this idea of not using anything with elastic in them, i want them to fit my hands closely in a single stitch pattern and then transition into either a fencepost or fishnet design (not sure which yet) that will just skim over my arm and end as an opera length glove. since it wont have any elasticity to hold it up (i thought it would ruin the lines of the net pattern) im working on some sort of design that would have a tie at the end of the glove that could make it either be tied around the upper arm and worn individually as gloves or tied together across the back to be worn as an interesting net shrug.

i need to stop coming up with crazy shit. but for some reason the ideas are just pouring out right now.

www.nydailynews.com/ny_local/2009/08/04/2009-08-04_diane_schuler_mom_who_drove_van_wrong_way_on_the_taconic_killing_8_was_drunk_on_.html


how many more people have to die horribly for some idiots to get a clue that driving while intoxicated is a bad idea? and that youre not only taking your own life into your hands, but the lives of other innocent people? you would be lucky to kill only yourself.

oh wait...its not that people who drive drunk arent aware of the risks. its that they just dont give a shit. and they often pay for it with their lives, as they should. but what are the people who die with them paying for?

why is it that spending time in the city always leaves me feeling hungover the next day? joe and i spent the day in the city yesterday and while we didnt do anything more strenuous than grossing people out on the subway, drinking bubble tea (quickly), wandering around little italy and again, being sickeningly teenagerish....i am exhausted today. and unexpectedly joeless, due to his being called back to work because of a "problem".

on the plus side...i found a bubble tea shop i like even more than the one i used to patronize, and slept better last night than i have in MONTHS. i spent today relaxing, cooking turkey, watching dvds of 90210, and working on projects.


i need more weekends like this. next weekend? may or may not be GIANT FUCKING DINOSAUR ROBOT WEEKEND with joe.

my hair is actually my natural hair color again (but with slight, glowy, sunny improvements).

i have a date on saturday that im extremely excited about (and my date has already gotten the coley stamp of approval).

speaking of coley, were starting "trueblood tuesdays" at my house and if anyone else wants to get in on this, they are welcome.

one of the minor annoyances in my life is that I'm obsessed with the Sookie Stackhouse mystery series, I love TrueBlood (they've done a great job of adapting the books, although I do miss a few elements), and I don't have HBO so I can't watch the premiere tonight.


However, my dad and Kathy also like it, so I might be able to beg them to watch it ondemand when I go to visit them.

being in newburgh didn't help. if anything it was worse because i had to put on a happy face for patients i know and love.

so next saturday (may 9th) im going to be taking a little road trip. i dont really NEED a navigator, as ive been where im going (rhode island) many times, but company is always welcome.

im going to be doing a bit of reconnaissance work while im there...visiting old haunts, looking for new ones, and doing some walking on the beach/breachway. if anyones interested in joining me, text, call, or email. :) ill be leaving early in the morning (im hoping to roll into narragansett about lunchtime) and get back around bedtime.

i have been working nonstop since my birthday. i suppose its ok. more work means more $$. but at this point im so burnt out, and my hands have been having spasms, that if i didnt have to work one tuesday, id be thrilled. i can afford it. really, its ok. work is more emotionally stressful than most people realize. it does do things to me physically. but its the emotional toll thats becoming problematic. its the having to be "on" all the time, and be chipper, and hide the other parts of me. the parts of me that are crumbling. and its work thats making them crumble. everything else is good, annd nothing is really going on. its just dealing with so many people constantly thats wearing me down.

and either because of the working so strenuously or some other mysterious thing going on with my body (whoknowaz swears that heinrich knocked something loose in there....but really, it's a female reproductive system, not a grandfather clock), ive been in pain for about a week and have had to take more vicodin in a week than ive taken in the past year. itll be ok. ill protect the girls. well...the one remaining girl that will combine with dr. evil's little swimmers to make an evil genius baby.

as some kind of cross-marketing ploy, "star trek VI: the undiscovered country" is being released in some theaters simultaneously with the new star trek movie.

now....a) of the previous star trek movies, "the voyage home" was easily the best. you've got the punk on the bus, the whales, "wodka", "double dumbass on you!!".....there's no way "undiscovered country" can compete with this.

b) it also doesn't have zachary quinto in it. and while hes not as hot playing Spock as he is when he's Gabriel Gray/Sylar....I'd still tap some Vulcan ass. JJ Abrams+young, hot guys= Jess needing to see the new star trek movie.

although, vulcans dont exactly show emotion, so how much fun would it be plowed by one? not much. ill stick with my milo, who is unfortunately making cruddy movies like "pathology" and breaking up with Hayden Panetierre. milo, she wasn't good enough for you anyway. id help take the pain away but im far too busy lusting after my hot non-boyfriend who is an evil genius and also bears a passing resemblance to you, only...better.

it's been a weird, long, sorta cruddy week. people around me are being...unlike themselves, not necessarily in positive ways. i was planning to do all kinds of nifty things around the house and i feel unmotivated to do anything.

wow.

my birthday was a day full of surprises. it kicked ass. one of the bestest birthdays ever. i know im fortunate to have such wonderful people in my life...but i didnt expect such an outpouring of love and affection and "you rock!"-type sentiments.

coley, henry, juancito, kyle, joe, stavid, leah,and my family-family (to distinguish from the aforementioned adoptive family)- and even my PATIENTS-....you made it amazing. thank you for not letting me forget how lucky i am, and for not forgetting that at times even a dorky drama queen can suffer from attacks of awesome.

i love you people. love is a pretty powerful, amazing feeling. it swells inside my chest so much that at times its overwhelming. ive often thought that being so vulnerable, so open to hurt, is a weakness. its certainly helped me get some spectacular kicks in the teeth. but its also made my life pretty goddamn great. there is no way i can regret opening myself up to the adventures that life has to offer, since its brought me all of you. weakness? vulnerability? loving all of you makes me strong.

my life would suck without you.

turning 32? pretty grate, akshully.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/eonline/20090330/en_top_eo/106745

....but i did.

i had an amazing time in boston. i met up with old friends and made new ones and drank actual beer (and liked it!) and rode the t and it was a weird, surreal, but ridiculously fun weekend. i will definitely go back there now.

i cant believe i had a great time in boston. how odd.